Wednesday, May 28, 2008

God never stops teaching. in fact, to even think He would when i was only 21 would be ridiculous. anyway, God's been teaching me how to mess up better these last few months.
four years ago, when i came to mtsu for the first time, i looked around for a church for a whole semester, finally landing at this little baptist church on the corner of campus where some of my new-found friends were going. while we were there, the pastor did everything he could to to accommodate us as college students. everything from staying up late to lock up after we'd been there on a weeknight to standing up to his deacons, putting his job on the line, to protect our place in their church family.
two years ago, after all but one of those friends graduated and moved away, i decided to leave. but i didn't tell anybody... i just left and never went back. not even giving the man who had done so much for me a simple "goodbye".
ever since then, it has weighed heavily on my heart. i felt awful for the longest time. i knew that God had drawn me away from that church to another one in the area, and that i was now at the right place to give myself away to a group of teenagers. but i had left so badly.
two saturdays ago, i was sending out some letters to announce my graduation and to ask for support through prayer for my move to logan, and felt it was time to do something about it. i wrote a letter to the pastor and put it in an envelope with a copy of this other letter and taped it to the door of the church. then sunday, i went back. i was so scared of what his reaction would be because i knew i had messed up. after the service, we got to talk and catch up, and it was wonderful. i must've apologized a dozen times in the letter, but in person, it was like those words didn't even cut it to explain what i felt. but he did not require anything of me. it was as though it was all old news. a marvelous picture of God's mercy on us.
God is teaching me the dire importance of reconciliation. his people cannot continue to be divided by petty differences, deep hurts and denominational boundaries. or as paul wrote:

"[12]For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. [13]For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit. [14]For the body does not consist of one member but of many. [15]If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less a part of the body. [16]And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," that would not make it any less a part of the body. [17]If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? [18]But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. [19]If all were a single member, where would the body be? [20]As it is, there are many parts, yet one body.
[21]The eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you," nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you." [22]On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, [23]and on those parts of the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor, and our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, [24]which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, [25]that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. [26]If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together."

-[1 corinthians 12:12-26]

"[4] For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future. [5] There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism, [6] and one God and Father, who is over all and in all and living through all."

-[ephesians 4:4-6]


::

Sunday, May 25, 2008

today is the day. i start the first leg of my journey to logan this evening, but it won't be north-east, it'll be south-west. i'm going to my parents' house in jackson, tennessee for a few days, because they usually like to see me every once in a while. it's weird for this part of my life (in murfreesboro) to finally be over. it doesn't really feel like it yet, kind of like it didn't really feel like i actually graduated. for a few weeks afterward i kept expecting them to tell me i had to come back, but the only thing they sent me was a diploma. this, of course feels a lot more like i'm leaving for real than it felt like i really graduated... so if you're keeping track, you can create a little feelings scale to measure future events to. you're so craft-y.

::

Thursday, May 22, 2008

hey everybody,
this is my new blog page for information about the brand new adventure God is taking me on to west virginia.
as God's story is very long, so is the part of it that chronicles my journey logan (not relatively, of course). God has been working in my life to prepare me for this step in my life basically since my life began on this earth. but, that story would be very long (not relatively, of course) and most likely send some of you to sleep early tonight. so i won't start at the beginning.
the summer after my junior year in high school, my youth group went on a missions trip to west hamlin, west virginia through an organization called YouthWorks!. my first summer of college (2005), i found out that one of my friends from that very same youth group was applying for a summer staff position with YouthWorks! and told me i should to. I didn't have anything to do that summer and wanted to do something more fruitful than flipping burgers somewhere, so i did. i come to find out that summer from the girl who interviewed me, and later just so happened to be my area director (read: boss), that if the recruiting department didn't pray over the applications, i probably would not have been hired (read: i was not an ideal candidate). that summer i got placed in chattanooga, tennessee. The next two summers i was placed in logan. i would have never heard of the place had i not been hired the first summer, which was not of my own merit.
after this last summer (2007), i was really struggling hard with what to do after school, and spending two summers in logan had opened my eyes to a lot of the hurt and need going on in the community. i had been toying with the idea of maybe moving there... maybe...
then one day, alissa and i were wandering around nashville handing out lunches to some homeless people and we came upon this guy in a wheel chair (glen) who was with a friend (tc). we had two left so we offered them to them. they were happy to oblige. we were making small talk when glen said to us something along the lines of, "You guys are with God, huh? I can tell." well this caught our attention. we sat with him and his friend and listened as he told us stories of his life and how he relies on God everyday to take care of him. we sat and listened for quite a while, and after maybe half an hour glen turned to me and said, "God just gave me a message for you." i must admit that i was skeptical and a little amused; i wanted to hear what he had to say. he handed me his Bible and told me to open to mark chapter 11, verses 23 and 24, and to read it aloud. i did. and as i did, my attitude changed, because i knew that God was speaking to me. it says,
"Truly I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be taken up and thrown into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it and it will be yours."
i knew right away that God wanted me in logan, as it was the desire of my heart to serve his people there. i'm not saying this means if you ask for a purple pony for christmas and really believe in your heart that you'll get it, then you'll find one with a bow on it eating your tree on christmas morning. that's stupid. God can do anything. If the desires of His heart are the desires of your heart, he can manifest your most outrageous dream about fulfilling those desires into reality.
God still speaks today. God still wants to use you in part of His marvelous story. our stories are His story.
i had been praying that God would send someone to take care of His people in logan. He finally showed me i had been praying for myself.

::